Experimenting with Writing

As a Toltec and Warrior Goddess, part of my spiritual practice is running experiments. My current experiment is to really try on this role of “Writer” for the next several weeks. A few months ago I signed up for a writing workshop because I have known that part of my contribution to this world would be writing a book about my experiences with my late husband. I knew this in my heart and being before he passed away, and now it has been three years, and I am ready to try my hand at writing. I know I have stories to tell and lessons learned that others may resonate with, and so as part of my writing journey, I want to share what I wrote today in answer to the following prompt: “What do you feel are your 5 core values?”

What are my core values . . . ? Hmmmmm . . . not necessarily in order of importance . . . Love, Presence, Stillness, Learning and Acceptance, it's hard to choose only five to be honest. I want to keep adding because it is my nature to want to include everything and not leave anything out, not wanting anyone else to feel like I have left anything out, and feeling the need to defend my choices as the good and right choices. So, why did I choose these five core values of love, presence, stillness, learning, and acceptance? Let's find out.


First, I chose love, because I feel so strongly that first we should lead with love in all that we do. When I dream of this love, it is true love, it is an unconditional love. It is love without fear, it is pure. I believe when we lead with love in our lives, in all that we do, others will feel this love, they will remember that feeling they had when they were in our presence. They will know that they were truly in the presence of love, that no matter what they have done or said in the past, in that moment they are loved, and worthy of that love. This love is not always fluffy with unicorns and rainbows, it can be very practical and responsible as well. And this sense of responsibility and practicality, because we live in this world where some things just need to get done, can also be approached with love. Remember that this love is not just for others, it is unmistakably for ourselves as well. This may be the hardest part of fulfilling and living completely in love. True self-love means loving all parts of ourselves, the wonderful parts, and the not so wonderful parts. Love is honest, and forgiving, and love can also be fierce when needed. Living from and embodying love in my life everyday is of great importance to me, it helps me shine.


Next, I chose presence. To me presence is living in the moment with deep awareness. Many people call this mindfulness. To me it is living in the present, being completely aware of what the physical, mental, emotional, energetic and spiritual components of my being are feeling, experiencing, and wanting. This deep awareness helps me to better align with what I really want and need in this life and it also helps me to notice and ask what the other humans, animals, and beings in my life want and need. The beautiful and interesting thing about all of these core values that I find I want to live by is, that they all take practice. I must practice presence, I must practice love, I must practice all of my core values, because sometimes they don't come easy, or sometimes, I get stuck in old habits, yet it is my innate nature to get up and keep practicing.


Third, I chose stillness. Stillness for me is an inner stillness. It is peace, hope, love, and presence all wrapped up into one. It is a sense of inner calmness, my mind is completely silent, my emotions are like a serenely flowing brook, and my energy is tranquil, calm, and rested. With this stillness, I can access my deep knowing, my intuition and wisdom, and really know what my next action steps are, and how to make big and small decisions that come up in life. In physical movement, I often find this inner stillness while walking in nature, while dancing, or practicing yoga. It is very freeing and comforting being able to access this inner stillness. Stillness is my "true work". Finding this stillness within myself, embodying it, and radiating it out into the world and through my work in the world, is something I have been practicing for several years. Like love and presence, it is a practice.


Next, I chose learning. Learning is not only my profession, it is my life's journey. I love to read, listen to podcasts, teach, listen to other people's stories, and learn new modalities of healing and living. Not everything is interesting to me, but there are so many subjects that are interesting to me that I find myself constantly learning. Part of this learning is integrating. Sometimes I find myself not giving myself enough time to integrate what I have learned because I am jumping into the next topic. Sometimes, then I have to go back and re-visit, re-learn. I suppose that is what life is, a journey of learning and re-learning. Learning can happen formally, or informally, daily, and in many different ways. Maybe at some point we master something but the real joy comes in the learning, experiencing. For me, part of learning, is sharing. Sharing the knowledge and wisdom we acquire along the way. I believe in sharing, there is a deep gift for the teacher, it is joy, satisfaction, and a solidifying of what we have learned.


Finally, my fifth core value is that of acceptance. Acceptance of what is and what may come. Acceptance of all of life, the good and bad, the beautiful and ugly things in life, the hard times, and times when life just seems to flow. Acceptance allows us more peace and less suffering. Acceptance helps us to avoid blaming ourselves and others and playing the victim. Acceptance helps us to take action, instead of spending too much time in denial and procrastination. Acceptance that, as my teacher HeatherAsh Amara says, "Life is perfectly imperfect, unpredictable, and unexplainable." When we learn how to accept that, life can be more joyous and complete.


So, those are my five core values: love, presence, stillness, learning, and acceptance. I could add or subtract, but I think this is a good list. It may or may not resonate with you, but it resonates with where I am at in my life. I try every day to practice and embody these core values. At times I may falter, wait, at times I do falter, and that's ok, because one of the many things I have learned on this journey is that it serves no one to beat myself up about it, instead, I re-focus my energy and intent to live by these core values to the best of my ability each day.

Much love to you on your journey,

Rachel